Exiting a toxic relationship is liberating yet disorienting. You go from recognizing the need to leave to finding your footing again – a process that’s deeply personal and full of emotional challenges. In order to enter into the next phase of your life with confidence and stability, you must take time to heal on an emotional level.
What is Emotional Healing?
Emotional healing is often described as the process of acknowledging, accepting, and processing painful life experiences and poignant emotions so that you can move into a healthier version of yourself.
Contrary to popular belief, emotional healing is not about minimizing the pain or controlling the emotions associated with the trauma you’ve experienced. Instead, it’s about leaning into it, embracing your feelings, and then processing them in a way that allows you to move forward.
Emotional healing takes time – often lots of it – but it results in a long-term feeling of lightness and freedom that was not previously present.
5 Tips for Emotional Healing
Walking away from a toxic relationship isn’t easy. In fact, it can actually create more issues and pain in the short term. But if you’re committed to emotional healing, it’ll be a positive in the long run.
Here are some tips to help:
1. Acknowledge Your Feels
Listen, you’re going to have all the feels after exiting a toxic relationship – and that’s okay. The first step towards healing is acknowledging the mix of feelings you’re experiencing.
It’s okay to feel sad, angry, confused, or even relieved. These emotions are all valid responses to the end of a toxic relationship. You might be tempted to push these feelings away or pretend everything is fine, but it’s important to face them head-on. Give yourself the space and time to feel whatever comes up, knowing it’s all part of the healing process.
2. Be Kind to Yourself
You’re coming out of a relationship that didn’t have much kindness. It’s time to grant yourself a healthy dose of kindness and self-compassion. Stop placing the blame on yourself, and remember that you’re never responsible for someone else’s toxic behavior.
It may be helpful to view yourself in the same light that you would a friend who is coming out of a toxic relationship. Grant yourself that same level of understanding and gentleness. This may look like slowing down, resting, and seeking out encouragement.
3. Find a Therapist
There’s no reason, other than stubbornness, to try and do this on your own. You’re dealing with some deep emotional scars that need to be addressed. Unfortunately, it’s often hard to do this on a DIY basis. You need a trained therapist who can walk with you through this.
Finding a therapist isn’t as difficult or stressful as you might think. Thanks to online resources, you can find local options in any state. That means if you’re in Florida, you can find a Florida therapist to help you address emotional healing after a toxic relationship. The same goes for if you’re in California or Montana.
4. Reconnect With Others
Toxic relationships can often lead to a loss of connection with yourself and the people who care about you. Rebuilding these connections is a crucial step in your healing journey. Start by spending time alone, and getting to know yourself again.
- What are your interests, goals, and values?
- What makes you happy?
- What does a “good day” look like for you?
Journaling, meditating, or spending time in nature can be great ways to explore these questions. You don’t need to rush to find the answers. Take your time and enjoy the process, as it can be very rewarding.
5. Embrace Creativity
One of the best ways to heal is by embracing creativity. When your brain goes into a creative space, it has no place for toxicity or regret. It frees you up to feel things that are enjoyable and rewarding.
Your version of creativity is going to be unique. However, people commonly turn toward things like writing, painting, dancing, or music after ending toxic relationships.
Adding it All Up
There’s no handbook for getting over a toxic relationship. Every situation is unique. However, there are plenty of techniques you can use to give yourself a more solid footing as you move into the next phase of your life. Hopefully, some of the suggestions discussed in this article will allow you to find a new path forward.