Home Leave Donald Trump alone: He’s the healthiest obese almost-80-year-old alive
Politics

Leave Donald Trump alone: He’s the healthiest obese almost-80-year-old alive

Chris Graham
donald trump
Image: © LifetimeStock – Shutterstock

I think we’re giving Donald Trump too hard a time for being three weeks away from turning 80.

“Just finished my 6 month physical at Walter Reed Military Medical Center. Everything checked out PERFECTLY,” Trump posted to Truth Social on Tuesday, which, good news, right?

Now, the concept of a “6 month physical” might seem a bit much, but actually, no.

I mean, Mayo Clinic says “healthy 80-year-olds do not need comprehensive physicals every six months,” but then the folks there also say “those with chronic conditions or complex medication regimens may need to see their doctor every three to six months for monitoring.”

OK, so, Trump, who does, you have to admit, look like he’s been rode hard, is in the “every three to six months for monitoring” phase.

So what, right?

And so, he falls asleep in meetings a lot; who doesn’t?

That doesn’t have to be “severe daytime somnolence,” as CNN medical analyst Jonathan Reiner termed it today.

Most of the meetings he’s falling asleep in are nonsense anyway.

Let’s see you sit through some economics doof with a bowtie droning on about inelasticity after you were up half the night posting memes of yourself drowning libtards in vats of raw sewage.

The fact that he’s still upright as he’s sawing logs on live TV is an accomplishment.

I’m not even concerned about the increasing frequency of the dementia tests – it seems that he’s being directed to take one every couple of days.

The fact that he keeps passing them means, among other things, he still knows how to tell time, what day it is, which one is the giraffe.

Give the guy a break already.

He’s an old man, and a grotesquely obese one at that.

The guy has been on the “Super Size Me” diet that dang-near killed documentary filmmaker Morgan Spurlock in a mere 30 days for the past 30 years.

You try tipping the scales at 350, with a cholesterol level at 20W-50, getting no exercise outside of endlessly flapping your gums, and see if you worry about your ankles being swollen, and your hands turning purple.

Every day this guy doesn’t stroke out on his way to the helicopter on the White House lawn is a miracle.

That’s going to be you and me some day.

Video





Multimedia

 

Chris Graham

Chris Graham

Chris Graham is the founder and editor of Augusta Free Press. A 1994 alum of the University of Virginia, Chris is the author and co-author of seven books, including Poverty of Imagination, a memoir published in 2019. For his commentaries on news, sports and politics, go to his YouTube page, TikTok, BlueSky, or subscribe to Substack or his Street Knowledge podcast. Email Chris at [email protected].

Latest News

police ICE agent
Trump's America

John Whitehead | The gloves are off: ICE, electric shock weapons and secret police

classical music
Local

Series to highlight ‘250 Years of Local Music’ in Charlottesville, Albemarle

The Albemarle Charlottesville Historical Society will be partnering with The Front Porch to host a seven-month program series entitled “250 Years of Local Music: Exploring Musical Traditions of Charlottesville & Albemarle."

soccer
Sports

Women’s Soccer: #13 UVA rolls to 7-0 win over La Salle to improve to 3-0-0

I’m not sure why you play teams that you’re going to beat 7-0, which was the final score for #13 Virginia in its game with La Salle on Thursday at Klöckner Stadium.

new japan pro wrestling
Sports

G1 Climax 36 finale review: Ryohei Oiwa vs. Yuya Uemura for the title shot

uva basketball
Basketball, Go 'Hoos

UVA Basketball: Comparing Roussell’s non-conference schedule to Coach Mox

uva football solomon beebe
Football, Go 'Hoos

UVA Football: Backup tailback Solomon Beebe arrested on animal-cruelty charges

Tom Perriello
Virginia Politics

Democrats target Tom Perriello, offer resources to flip Fifth District seat