Dying to see “The Interview”?

Yeah, sure, terrorist attacks over “The Interview.” We believe that. And not that, oh, I don’t know, Sony isn’t finding some success creating a viral marketing campaign around the film, starring Seth Rogen and James Franco, which centers around a pair of talk-show hosts tasked with the responsibility of offing North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un.

Because we’re not all talking about “The Interview” and how it seems that the North Koreans hacked the emails of top Sony executives where they had nasty things to say about pretty much everybody famous who has anything to do with Sony as a response to the movie.

And how now the same people who hacked the emails are now promising to rain down horrors worse than 9/11 on moviegoers. You know, because the North Koreans have proven so adept at delivering on its promises related to anything military, political or anything else.

So now I’m to believe that if I go down the street to the local theater on Christmas Day to watch “The Interview” I might be vaporized by a North Korean hit squad. But that the same hit squad wasn’t able to get its act together back when the South Park guys put out another movie poking fun at Kim Jong-il.

I’ll play along.

Mainly because I like stupid comedies, and also because, goddammit, I’m not going to let some North Korean terrorists tell me what I can and can’t waste my money and time on.

Ahem, if I want to watch a dumb fantasy about bombing an impotent fascist back to the Stone Age on Christmas Day with buttery popcorn and M&Ms as my dinner, then that’s my constitutional right.

(Pretty sure that one fits under the 10th Amendment. But I only got a B in my 400-level constitutional law class, and that was 20 years ago, before the conservatives rewrote everything under the guise of originalism.)

Wearing my marketing guru hat, I admire what Sony has been able to do to get attention. The leak about how they’re planning to pull the movie was a nice touch, not quite as effective as that fake suspension that A&E threw down this time last year to try to revive “Duck Dynasty,” but still pretty good.

– Column by Chris Graham