Virginia Tech children’s emotions expert offers tips for back-to-school jitters

As summer wanes and children return to the classroom, back-to-school excitement may be overshadowed by feelings of anxiety.

Cindy Smith, director of the Children’s Emotions Lab at Virginia Tech, said uncertainty around unfamiliar situations can lead to anxiety among children.

“The uncertainty may be greater if they are entering a school that is new to them, such as kindergarten, or moving from elementary school to middle school,” Smith, a professor in the Department of Human Development and Family Science, said.

Uncertainty about who their teachers will be, whether they will have friends in their classes or fit in with their peers, riding the bus for the first time, or even navigating to their classrooms are common stressors for children returning to school, according to Smith.

New academic challenges can also contribute to feeling of anxiety.

“Children may worry about being successful academically or about the amount of homework that they will have,” she said.

The best thing parents and guardians can do, Smith said, is to create a space where children feel safe sharing their feelings.

“Encouraging children to express emotions can help parents to understand how their children are feeling, and then parents can help children figure out ways to deal with their emotions,” she said.

Smith offered the following tips for coping with back-to-school nerves:

• Watch for subtle signs of anxiety: Stomachaches or increased irritability may be clues that a child is stressed.
• Keep communication open: Encourage children to share their feelings and validate their emotions.
• Avoid dismissing their worries: Use an “emotion coaching philosophy,” and treat emotions as opportunities for growth and learning.
• Choose your words carefully: Phrases like “it will be fine” or “you shouldn’t worry” do not acknowledge how children are feeling, potentially making them less likely to open up and increasing their anxiety.
• Connect through enjoyable activities: Doing something fun together can help create opportunities to talk about what’s on their mind.