Trump regime on high gas prices: ‘Gas up in a red state.’ We did the math: It’s not mathing

Doug Burgum, the former North Dakota governor-turned-Trump interior secretary, said, out loud, for the world to hear, in a Fox News hit on Sunday night that people in blue states concerned about high gas prices just need to drive to a nearby red state, where gas prices are “53 cents cheaper per gallon.”

“If you’re going to gas up, here’s a tip: gas up in a red state,” said Burgum, who Trump appointed to head up the Department of the Interior because of his smoking hot wife, Kathryn, after seeing a photo of Kathryn Burgum on a horse.

Maybe he should have made Kathryn Burgum the interior secretary.

She looks better on a horse than he makes sense telling us where to buy gas.

Seriously, gotta love the logic of ol’ Doug here – get in the car, drive to the nearest red state, fill ‘er up, drive back home, and somehow this will save you money.

Not sure where he got the “53 cents a gallon” number, but I want to give him the benefit of the doubt here.

As it happens, I live in a blue state, where, coincidentally, the average gas price is actually 11 cents a gallon under the national average – Virginia, on average, is paying $3.68 a gallon for gas today, per GasBuddy; the national average is $3.79 a gallon.

Specific to my little part of Virginia, Waynesboro is at $3.55 a gallon today, so, we’re 24 cents a gallon off the national average.

Fun factoid to note here: West Virginia, the red state on the other side of the Alleghanies, is paying, on average, $3.74 a gallon, per GasBuddy.

The cheapest border county is Greenbrier, where the gas is $3.66 a gallon, on average, right now, the GasBuddy numbers tell us.

The easiest place for me to get to in Greenbrier County would be White Sulphur Springs, which is located along I-64; that’s a 103-mile drive, so, 206 miles round-trip.

The number of times I’ve made this particular 206-mile round trip in my life: zero.

My inclination to make this trip to pay more for gas: less than zero.

Now, North Carolina, a hybrid state politically – Democrat governor, Republican state legislature – has gas, on average statewide, at $3.49 a gallon, so, six cents a gallon cheaper than what I am paying in Waynesboro.

And if I want to drive on the other side of the border from Danville, into their Rockingham County, I can go as low as $3.48 a gallon; and if I dare to drive south of Greensboro into Davidson County, their gas is averaging a suh-weet! $3.37 a gallon.

Waynesboro to Thomasville, N.C., just off I-85 in Davidson County, between Greensboro and Charlotte, is a 199-mile drive, so, 398 miles round trip.

My 2025 Jeep Wrangler gets in the area of 22 miles per gallon on the highway, with a 21.5-gallon tank.

Quick math: I get around 473 miles highway out of a fill-up.

I make the drive down to red-state Thomasville for that fill-up, saving 18 cents a gallon – for a grand total of $3.87, 18 cents times 21.5 gallons – then head back home, and I’ve got, maybe, four gallons left to drive around town in absolute style, baby.

I think I’ll pass.