In this topsy-turvy world that we live in, which makes no sense most of the time, yay, new toilets.
We bought our house five years ago this month, and among the first things we said, even before we bought the place, was, need new toilets.
Not very wisely, it had nothing to do with the fact that the old ones were environmentally unfriendly, which they were, using more water than Lake Michigan, running forever and a five-count from the referee beyond that after flushing.
We just didn’t like the way they looked.
And then: we were just lazy.
We had trees removed, bought a new washer and dryer, bought and sold cars and replaced them, but the idea of new toilets seemed a luxury.
What finally moved us: a big water bill.
Which probably had nothing to do with the old toilets, but it got us thinking.
Eh, might as well do something.
These new bad boys are a marvel of modern technology. I want to stand there and flush them over and over, they’re so damned awesome.
(Which would defeat the point, obvs.)
They barely use any water, which is the key here.
More importantly: whoosh.
Awesome.
New toilets, don’t take ‘em for granted.
Column by Chris Graham
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