‘Getting the ick’: JMU professor’s studies reveal impact of social media, TikTok on Gen Z dating

Two studies published in early summer by JMU Associate Professor in the School of Communication Studies Dr. Jennie Rosier explore how dismissive attachment patterns have subtly infiltrated Generation Z’s dating norms.

According to the studies, the patterns have radically altered the way young adults initiate, engage in and exit romantic relationships.

Drawing from in-depth interviews and thematic analysis of TikTok content, Rosier’s work reveals a pervasive culture of emotional distancing and premature relationship dissolution, which is often disguised as hyper-independence or humor. The studies illuminate how social media, attachment insecurity and performative online behaviors are reshaping the romantic trajectories of emerging adults, with long-term consequences for relational stability and well-being.

Key findings:
“Getting the ick” is a viral, dismissive dating norm. What began as a niche phrase on reality television has become a TikTok-fueled justification for abruptly ending relationships over trivial or awkward behaviors, often without conversation or resolution.

Gen Z is dating casually even when they want commitment. Young adults report wanting long-term, meaningful relationships, but feel trapped in dating norms, such as the “talking phase,” “situationships,” or casual app use, that actively discourage emotional vulnerability.

The “talking phase” reinforces non-committal behavior. A prolonged, undefined stage where partners communicate superficially, often via Snapchat, has become the norm, enabling avoidance of labels and deeper connection.

Online platforms fuel surface-level connections. Dating apps and social media offer curated, low-risk ways to meet and interact, aligning with dismissive tendencies and often leading to shallow or short-lived romantic involvement.

Implications for today:
Mental health and therapy must address dismissive norms. Mental health professionals should help Gen Z clients unpack culturally sanctioned distancing behaviors that may be sabotaging their desire for intimacy.

Dating education should include attachment literacy. Young adults can benefit from understanding how attachment styles influence dating decisions, emotional regulation and relational longevity.

Social media trends deserve critical scrutiny. Viral content—like “the ick” is not just entertainment, but shapes relational behaviors in ways that may undermine emotional connection and long-term well-being.