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Memo to Putin: Pull back a bit on the reins, man

PutinFriendly advice to Vladimir Putin: dude, you are severely overplaying your hand with whatever you have on Donald Trump.

Admire the chutzpah, of course, but it’s turning into hubris.

I mean, you’re getting every bit of what you want: not just NATO, but you actually got Trump to start pissing contests with Canada and Australia.

Australia. That’s genius. The Canadians can get annoying with all the eh? stuff and apologizing all the time. But Australia ain’t never done nothin’ to nobody.

That had to have been the sort of initiation ritual, like a gang getting a prospective new member to beat up some random guy at a convenience store, to prove that he’s down.

But, seriously, enough, is the advice.

Trump winked at you at the start of the press conference, for instance. He thinks he’s a made man, but that was the first sign that he’s out of his league, which, come on, you had to know that when you recruited him, back before that Miss Universe pageant.

Yeah, you needed a guy who could get elected, but wasn’t smart enough to go around asking a bunch of questions, so, congrats on that.

Even the idea of the summit was pushing the envelope a bit too far.

I’m not going to pretend that I’m not aware of why you’d want a summit. Nice dog-and-pony show, for what it was worth.

He did everything but ask out loud, how high?

And now, yeah, NATO knows, Republicans back home here in the States know.

But, you saw what Bob Mueller did, I’m sure. Took advantage of the hoopla to roll out more indictments.

Your KGB training might not have gone over the Nixon era, but even Republicans salivating over Supreme Court nominations have limits.

When Bob Goodlatte feels compelled to go out of his way to offer up the word dismayed in the context of something that the president has to say, you’ve crossed the Rubicon.

Your inclination is going to be to pull the string and get your boy to fire Mueller and pardon everybody.

I’d advise against that. In fact, if I’m you, I let POTUS do something strongman, like announce a new round of sanctions, and I might even fudge some thunder, have your state media go on a rampage or something, to make it look legit, at least through, say, that first Tuesday in November, maybe.

Otherwise, great job, really. Lenin would be so proud.

Column by Chris Graham