Jack McClenahan: Reassume the position

Op-ed by Jack McClenahan

Despite the many naysayers and many negative comments about the fairness and the ability of the recent federal bailout plan to right our economic ship, we are already seeing many positive results.

Some of the first bailout monies were wisely used for the AIG executives to take a week long trip to a five-star spa and resort at a cost of ONLY $450,000. These poor fellows have been under a lot of stress and badly needed some R and R. It’s a small price for us taxpayers if we can get these guys back in shape and in the saddle to continue their leadership. I think a week at a five-star resort with golf, fine dining and spa treatments are just what any doctor would order. Nothing will do more for their self-esteem than having some hands-on massage therapy. Any one of these corporate execs will feel better about himself having a massage therapist named Bambi run her fingers up and down his corpulent body.

These corporate captains in our country have shared the goodies. Despite what people think these are sharing, warm individuals. For example, Senators Dodd and Biden have gotten sweetheart mortgage rates, and Congressman Barney Frank has been getting great spiffs from the maligned Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae.

John McCain (Mr. Maverick) was joined at the hip with the since-jailed Charles Keating in the not-too-distant savings and loan meltdown. Sen. Stephens has had all his construction and remodeling work on his private property handled by these magnanimous corporate Mother Theresas. And thank God Dick Cheney will soon be back in the private sector to continue his good work.

As for George W. Bush, maybe with the help of some shock treatments he will be able to return to run his ball team in Texas – even if only at a bat-boy level.

The political and corporate leadership in this country has come together with a plan to right our economic ship. What they need is more compliant followers.

I say withhold your negative judgments and be a good citizen and bend over and reassume your position. I say enjoy the ride!


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