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Chris Saxman: Cold Fusion – Ragin Cajun Edition

Following the second successful evening of gator hunting, the merry band,with all digits and limbs in tact, headed further down into Cajun Country to Cocodrie, Louisiana.

Google map that one. That place is DEEP in Cajun Country but has surprisingly good cell service. The t shirt at Boudreaux’s Marina reads “Where the road ends and the catching begins”.

One has to be at the marina at O Dark Thirty to catch the boat in order to get out to the marsh lands at the right tide such that one has a chance at landing Bull Red Fish. These beauties usually come in around 25-30 pounds and are caught with cracked blue crabs.

This knowledge was lost on our boat’s captain who thought we were going for speckled trout and broke out the plastic minnows. After four hours of not even catching a sun burn, we headed for the marsh lands and started using shrimp. We did not manage to land any Bull Reds but we did start catching red fish in the 6-8 pound range. As Captain Rob said, “these are good eating size”. He could have told us this four hours prior but

the result was better than I had anticipated heading down to where the road ends.

So, Cajun Fishing Plan A of using the wrong bait at the wrong time at the wrong place didn’t work. Using shrimp in the marsh lands at the right tide did.

Plan B worked.

Lost on the marsh lands and fairly good cell service, was the fact that the DC Gator Hunt was resolved without a government shutdown. They took the negotiations, not to the 11 hour, but the 23rd hour. It was that close and frankly totally unacceptable that the people duly elected to represent us and our interests played “Let’s See Who Blinks” with so many important things hanging in the balance.

Imagine being an E-3 serving in Afghanistan with a young wife and two kids back home staring down four dollar a gallon gas with a base salary of, what?, twenty three five? You think that makes his job any easier? While we were assured that some areas of the government remain open, you think the private first class who spends his day dodging IEDs and Taliban snipers was at ease with that talking point?

Really, how hard is it to pass a budget with a $1.6 TRILLION dollar deficit in the first place? Can’t get by for $1.562 TRILLION in deficit such that you make defunding Planned Parenthood the battle line? Really?

Nothing like having a generationally significant budget showdown turn on whether or not abortions are federally funded at Planned Parenthood. Some protest that abortions are not funded with federal tax dollars. Mule fritters. They are. Even if they aren’t, this was the battle line? Fannie Mae? Freddie Mac? Too Big To Fails? Nothing to see there, move along.

Arriving back in the beautiful, spring blossoming Shenandoah Valley one then proceeds to finalize the almighty and ever important tax return. Yes, it was time for the final score in the game of Government Value.

Needless to say, Government Value Plan A ain’t gettin it. Especially when you look at writing a check to the IRS the same week the POTUS announces his latest plan for addressing the burgeoning federal deficit and aggregated debt with a…wait for it…tax increase. Why not. How else do we kick this four dollar a gallon economy into gear?

How about a solid Plan B? Enter Congressman Paul Ryan of Wisconsin. He offers a plan in stark contrast to the leadership displayed by the leader of the free world. Well, it used to be free – we cannot have this much debt and actually consider ourselves free anymore.

Even the Ryan plan doesn’t balance the budget and we will continue to finance our government operations. Financing operations is a businessman’s no – no but in a democracy, it seems to be par for the course. So Plan B is a great step but is leaving us with the strong likelihood of a Plan C where most people will be left saying “C’MON! REALLY?”

Those of us who write the checks will remember that Vice President Joe Biden this week was so impressed by Obama’s most recent oratorical brilliance, that he actually fell asleep on national television during the speech.

So Plan C is what? You guessed – Check Writing. In the end of the next Showdown of a Generation, there will be a tax increase. The left will learn that they can take this to the wire and this time they will win. The resulting primaries on the right will be bloody and expensive.

Unless of course, the GOP learns the lessons of the Virginia Republicans from 2005 through 2010. Yes Virginia, it is okay to actually cut the budget and be returned to office.

Call this Plan D. DUH. WINNING! (Charlie is back!)

Winning the Future as the president says is the goal, right? How about try a little Cajun Common Sense – try something else. The current taxing and spending model is not working.

The road for can kicking is about to end. Time to catch a little reality, Mr President. Even your Vice President was bored with your leadership to the point where he fell asleep. On national television.

Meanwhile, I have a check to write and I’ll write more to prevent my kids from doing so as long as EVERYONE else has to pay. Plan E – flat tax – fair. Everyone pays something.

That way we might be United again. Today, we are not and Plan F, as in What The…, is a bad plan. It makes gator hunting seem sane.

Column by Chris Saxman